I don’t think it’s ridiculous to cry when you re-read what you’ve written and find out it’s shite. The dialogue’s so flat! So cliche!
The self-critic has the power to paralyze so you furiously stab the “x” button to keep the monstrousity lost forever. Students have the luxury of the all-knowing red ink, crossing, circling, and underlining mistakes that have gone unnoticed.
But honing your craft alone is tricky. All these blogs boom “read, read, read”, “practice, practice, practice” but what if your writing is still the worst thing ever?
Even though it’s cringey, we have to accept the wooden sentences and 2D characters that have found its way on paper.
But we have to keep records.
Whether you’ve left a short story on “Private” or it’s buried deep in your computer, bite the bullet and re-read your work.
I found my two-year-old blog the other day and decided to check out ~the past self~. Was it really as horrific as I remembered?
No. It wasn’t.
And it broke my heart because doubt had sunk its claws into my temples and flooded me with self-loathing, disappointment, and zapped any confidence I ever had.
Sure, sentences were riddled with spelling mistakes and it was far from perfect, but it just shows how debilitating a lack of confidence can be.
OKAY, SO HOW DO YOU OVERCOME THIS & THRIVE?
The cure is to think like a male politician.
Not the sweet boy who chews his cuffs in the corner of the room but that guy who thunders his opinions the day after everyone’s wrecked, convinced his views on the Israel-Palestine conflict and third-wave Feminism are correct.
It’s possible to emulate confidence. You just have to tell yourself:
- “I’m always improving!”
- “It’s going to be an endless journey but I’m going to be gentle on myself.”
- “You can’t get any worse, you can only progress.”
This is the bolt of energy we need pouring from our fingers and onto paper.
We’ve got this guys!
swirlygirl* 
Very good advice, I wish I had kept all of my old stories.
I systematically threw them away over the years whenever I came across an old notebook and I even completely deleted my work from my old blog I started nearly 10 years ago and replaced my stories with reblogged pictures of fitness quotes, because that’s what was popular.
I have made it a rule of mine to never delete anything, its of so much value to our learning.
Thank you for this post 🙂
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Aww well it’s great you’ve kept them now! Gonna be crazy looking back when you’re old and grey heheh
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Distance lends perspective. Most of what I write is indifferent and some of it is rubbish, but sometimes when I look back at old posts one of them catches my eye. I read it back and yes, it’s really quite good and I ask myself “Did I write that? Me? Really me” And yes, I did. Would I change the odd word here and there? Yes, probably I could write it better today. Was it worth posting? Yes, definitely. I reckon this writing thing is all about learning, and as long as we remain objectively critical we can learn from both our good and our not-so-good efforts of the past.
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Definitely! It’s a constant journey which is so great. But we must try and be a little less harsh on ourselves sometimes :). Just gotta keep moving!
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